Travel and Outings
Time spent planning your outing or travel schedule is never time wasted. The younger your baby, the more you will have to plan. In the first few months, your baby’s feeding schedule won’t necessarily be very predictable, so you’ll need at least one spare bottle if you’re not breastfeeding and, of course, whatever changing equipment you normally use. Lightweight baby bags containing a portable changing mat are widely available. Plan your route so that you know where you can stop, where you can change your baby, and where you can feed him without embarrassment or inconvenience. If you’re planning to shop, it is even worth calling up stores to find out if they have a mother-and-baby changing room and avoiding those that don’t.
With a very young baby, it’s simply not worth undertaking a very busy outing where you will have to walk a great deal, carry heavy loads, or make lots of changes of transport. Be easy on yourself. Try to take a friend or your partner with you if you can, so there is always an extra pair of hands and someone to help you should a problem come up. Your baby can go with you anywhere so long as you’re well enough prepared and have something in which to carry him - a sling, stroller, or car seat.
Using a Stroller
If you do not want to carry your baby in a sling, a collapsible stroller is ideal for a small baby, who will fit comfortably and snugly into its shape. Babies are interested in their surroundings from an early age, so as soon as your baby can sit up, angle the stroller so he can see what is going on around him.
You must become adept at collapsing and opening the stroller within a few seconds without any problems, so practice at home before your first outing. If you cannot fold up the stroller efficiently, you will find people jostling to get in front of you when you are in a line, which will only add to your frustration. At the very least, you should be able to open it with only one hand, kick it shut with your feet, and know how to operate the brakes - and don’t forget you will have to do all these things while holding your baby. Here are a few safety tips:
- When you open your stroller, always make sure it is in the fully extended position with the brakes fully locked.
- Never put your baby in the stroller without a safety harness.
- Never, ever, leave your baby in a stroller unattended.
- Should your baby fall asleep in the stroller, adjust it to the lie back position so he can sleep comfortably.
- Don’t put shopping bags on the handles of the stroller; they can tip the stroller and your baby may be injured.
- When you stop, always put on the brakes because you could inadvertently take your hands off the stroller and it could roll away.
- Check your stroller regularly to make sure the brakes and catches work well and the wheels are in good condition.
Public Transportation
Using public transportation can really be a trial, as neither buses nor trains are equipped or serviced for mothers and young children. Picture yourself with a stroller, a heavy and wriggling baby, the baby bag, your handbag, a coat, and possibly a toddler in tow - public transportation is the last thing you want to face.
Of course, you can make things easier by never traveling in the rush hour or, with a young baby, carrying him around in a sling. For an older baby, a backpack makes you much more independent, and you can manage everything more easily with your hands free. Always prepare yourself well ahead of time. I simply would not leave home with my children without some distracting toys, a favorite book, and a favorite snack. All your belongings, including the stroller, should be gathered together prior to leaving and in good enough time so you can check them over to make sure you have not forgotten anything. The same goes for when you are getting off a bus or train; be ready to get off in plenty of time for your stop. Don’t hesitate to ask for help from fellow passengers.
Special Outings
Your baby is never too young for an outing; indeed, with a young baby you can go just about anywhere and, provided he can look around him, he will enjoy C. the change of scene even if he doesn’t understand much of what’s going on. When planning an outing for an older child, always try to consider what your child’s personality can cope with best. If you have a quiet child who has a long concentration span, you can take him to a flower show or museum, and point out the things around him. If, on the other hand, he’s very active, he’ll need more space to run around in and a trip to the zoo, a playground, or an outdoor event may be more appropriate. Wherever you go, be prepared to make endless stops to look at whatever catches your child’s attention. Always take enough drinks and snacks to keep your child happy for the full duration of the trip. Don’t take on a trip of any kind if you or your child are feeling out of sorts; the day is bound to be a disaster, so don’t feel guilty about canceling the outing altogether.
Cesarean Section
If a normal vaginal delivery could be dangerous or even impossible for you, your baby will be delivered by cesarean section. Small horizontal incisions are made in your abdomen and uterus, and your baby is delivered through them.The vertical cut is no longer used because there’s a risk it may tear again if you have another child. The number of babies delivered by cesarean section has increased rapidly and is currently about one in four in the United States. One reason for this increase is that doctors are worried about being sued if a difficult birth causes complications that could have been avoided by a cesarean section. Another is that the operation is now so safe that it can be less risky than some other forms of delivery.
The need for a cesarean section may be apparent well before labor begins, so you, your partner, and your obstetrician have time to talk through what will happen-this is an elective cesarean. In emergencies, the need only becomes evident once labor is under way.
Elective Cesarean Section
The most common reasons for choosing to have a cesarean include failure to progress in labor or dystocia (abnormally slow progress of labor), your baby being in a breech position or lying across your pelvis; placenta previa; and certain medical conditions such as active herpes type II infection. A cesarean may also be necessary if you’ve had one for a previous baby-the worry used to be that the scar would open up again. Experience has shown that this does not happen with the horizontal or “bikini” cut, now generally used instead of the vertical cut, and so hospitals often allow a vaginal delivery to begin, and if there are no problems, labor goes on as normal- a “trial of labor.”
Elective cesareans are often carried out under a spinal anesthetic. This has several advantages over a general anesthetic: it’s safer for your baby; you have no postoperative nausea or vomiting; and because you are conscious, you can hold your baby as soon as he’s born. It’s usually possible for your partner to be with you during the operation, just as he can be at a vaginal delivery.
When you’ve had a cesarean, you may feel deeply disappointed that you didn’t have a vaginal delivery. It’s natural to feel this way, and the best thing you can do is talk to your partner about it. If he describes the birth to you in detail it may help you to visualize and accept it. Also, remember that the way your child comes into the world isn’t nearly as important as having a healthy baby.
It also helps, of course, to prepare yourself in advance for this type of birth. Go and see the obstetrician with your partner and find out what the operation involves, what procedures will be used, and whether your partner is allowed to be there. Ask if you can see a video so you’ll know what’s going to happen to you. If you can, talk to other women who’ve had cesarean sections. They’ll be able to give you useful advice and reassurance.
Emergency Cesarean Section
An emergency C-section may be needed when something goes wrong during labor, such as a prolapsed umbilical cord, placental hemorrhage, fetal distress, or serious failure to progress in labor. Emergency cesarean sections may be carried out under epidural and the hospital may not allow your partner to be present at the operation.
After a Cesarean Section
As is the case with any major surgery, it takes time to recover from a cesarean, but even so you’ll be encouraged to get up and walk around a few hours afterward to stimulate your circulation. You’ll be given painkillers if you need them, and the dressings will be removed after three or four days. Your internal stitches will be made with absorbable sutures, which will dissolve away naturally. Skin stitches may also be absorbable, but if staples are used they should be removed within about a week.
Baby’s First Hours
Once your baby is delivered, all the attention will be given to her, not to you, and rightly so. She may cry first when delivered and will be bawling robustly a few seconds after birth. She’ll probably be a bluish-white color at first and may be covered with vernix-a white, cheesy substance that protects her skin in the womb. She’ll have streaks of blood on her and, depending on your delivery, her head may look slightly pointed after her journey down the birth canal.
Her First Moments
If her breathing is normal, there’s absolutely no reason why you shouldn’t hold her immediately. If there’s a danger of her being cold, you can be covered with a towel or blanket. Your gentle stroking movements and the sound of your heartbeat and voice will reassure your baby. Her eyes will almost certainly fasten on your face and she may scrabble as if trying to swim toward you.
Cutting the cord The first procedure after the delivery is the clamping of the cord. At the appropriate time, two clamps are applied to the cord, one a short distance from the navel, the other about an inch away. These clamps prevent the cord from bleeding, the one closest to your baby being the most important. At this point, your partner may be invited to cut the cord between the clamps. Some practitioners prefer to wait, however, until the placenta is delivered or the cord has stopped pulsating before cutting the cord. The cord may also be clamped and cut during delivery if it is looped tightly around your baby’s neck.
Her general condition The doctor or labor nurse will check your baby’s general condition. She’ll remove any fluid remaining in your baby’s mouth, nose, or air passages by sucking it out with disposable plastic tubing or a bulb syringe. If your baby doesn’t start to breathe immediately, the doctor will take her and give her oxygen, and the neonatologists will be called to the room.
Welcoming Your Baby
Once the nursing and medical staff have checked that both you and your baby are well, by all means ask them to leave if you want to be left alone in the warmth of your birthing room with your partner and your baby.
If you’ve had an episiotomy, you may have to wait until after you’ve been stitched; your doctor will be able to make a much neater repair if you’re stitched as soon as possible after the birth before the tissues swell. Once this is done, you can relax after your hard work and enjoy this amazing new experience together. It’s a good idea to put your baby to your breast immediately because it stimulates delivery of the placenta, even if your baby isn’t hungry at first.
Spend these first few moments concentrating on your baby, getting to know her, learning to recognize her face and cooing at her so that she can hear the sound of your voice. Ideally, hold her about 8-10 inches (20-25 centimeters) away from your face-at this distance she can make out your face quite clearly. Smile and talk gently in a sing-song voice, because newborn babies are attuned to high vocal pitches.
Let your partner hold his baby for the first time within half an hour of the birth. Men can bond as deeply and as quickly with their newborn children as women do.
After this initial bonding process, you’ll be washed down and asked to pass urine to make sure that everything’s in working order. You can then change, and the nurses will check your baby more thoroughly.
A More Thorough Check
Shortly after birth the doctor or nurse will make some specific checks on your baby. The doctor will check that her facial features and her body proportions are normal. She’ll be turned over to make sure that her back is normal and there are no indications of spina bifida. Her anus is checked, as are her fingers and toes. The number of blood vessels in the umbilical cord is recorded-there are usually two arteries and one vein. Your baby will then be weighed and her head circumference and possibly her body length measured. All this takes only a few seconds in the hands of an experienced doctor or mildwife.