Your Child’s Expanding World

Getting settled

The first day is the beginning of settling in, and for some children it may be all that’s required. Many children, however, take a little longer – sometimes weeks and even months – to settle into their preschool. The good news is that, however long it seems to take, your child will eventually settle in. Be guided by your own feelings about whether he’s confident and happy enough to be left on his own. If you feel he’s still a little young and shy, be prepared to stick around preschool or day care a little longer than other parents do. If the staff asks you to leave your child, explain that you’d like to remain on the premises, or ask them to call you if he doesn’t settle in.

Learning how to behave

This isn’t a new issue- you’ve probably been dealing with “misbehavior” since your child was 12 months old. Remember that children are still learning about the world, and “bad” behavior is just part of this process.

Young children have lots of ideas of their own and can be determined to get their own way. The other day, my daughter had a friend over to play. After being bossed around for a good part of an hour, the other child decided that she’d had enough and wanted to go home. My daughter refused to accept this. She started hitting the friend and shouting “You’ve got to stay! I want you to stay!” The irony of the situation, the fact that the last thing she was going to achieve by her behavior was to encourage the friend to stay, was lost on her.

Coping with difficult behavior

When your child gets into a fight with his friend, separate the children and try to explain to the aggressor why the tactics aren’t actually going to work. Always comfort the injured party (usually, it’s only their pride that’s been hurt) and give most of your attention to him. Psychologists say we should be wary of giving attention to the child who is behaving badly, because a child may be encouraged to more naughtiness when he or she notices that this type of behavior draws an adult’s attention.

Sharing isn’t something preschoolers learn to do overnight. One of the most vital aspects of preschool education, both formal and home-based, is teaching a child that much of what’s in the world has to be shared with others.